Peace of Mind
by ansley annie
Summary: hpsm teaser (marauders, not harry) This world seemed so much more real, but how did she know? She couldn’t. (summary pending)
1. I Don't Want To Be

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Story Title: Pending, but maybe **Peace of Mind** I think that's stupid, though. Suggestions?

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Prologue: I don't want to be

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Rating: PG13, pending

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Author: Ansley

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Email: enigmaansley@yahoo.com

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Disclaimer: The song _I Don't Want To Be _is by Gavin DeGraw. All characters and most places are adopted from either Harry Potter or Sailor Moon. They belong to their respected owners. The story line started from a Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode I watched, but developed differently. 

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Summary: This world seemed so much more real, but how did she know? She couldn't.

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BIG Note: Presently, this is JUST a teaser. I want it to be more, and am writing more to it, but I'm not so sure I'll continue. Please comment and share your thoughts. If I get a very good response, then I'll continue for sure. But, if I don't get a good response, I STILL MIGHT continue it. Well, I WILL continue it; I don't know if I'll finish it. That depends on how you all respond and whether I can keep my mind in one place long enough to finish this. (I have a LOT of unfinished stories.) I like this, and I think it had the potential for me to finish it. Who knows. If you like this story as much as my dear friend Bailey, then I will email you all the chapters as I write them. BUT! I won't post anything more on this until I finish the story, or have come really close to finishing it. Please read my story anyway.

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Note: Ahhhhh. Um… Oh yeah! I need a beta? I have one, but I feel guilty asking her, because she's my friend and I don't think she particularly likes betaing. If you are will to beta, email me at the above address. I will return the favor, too! I'm much better at betaing other peoples works than my own. Which is why there are so many errors in this.

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FINAL Note: Okay. I hope you enjoy this! Coz I forgot what I was going to say! **kthnxbye**

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Peace of Mind {!!!!} I don't want to be

On Earth, in the Eastern Hemisphere, in Canada, in the province Alberta, near the city Lamont, in an insane asylum, in a room near the top of the building, a girl sat up and opened her eyes.

"Bailey? It's about time. I'll call your family right away."

The girl's eyes couldn't focus, so she looked where she thought the voice came from.

"Bailey? But my name is Usagi…?" she whispered, her voice hoarse.

"Usagi is just in your head, dear. She's made up. Don't you remember who you are? You are Bailey Mae Black. You are fourteen years old. You have an older brother who goes to school in England, and you went there with him once. Surely you must remember your brother, Sirius Black?"

The girl stared blankly at the woman. Another nurse walked in and told the first nurse it was a waste of time, and that the girl would not remember through words from a stranger.

"Bailey, Dear, your brother, he'll be here in an hour, okay?" the second nurse assured her.

"Shingo's coming?" the girl begged.

The first nurse sighed. "No, Dear, there is no Shingo. He is from your imagination."

The second nurse continued, "but I'm sure you'll love this brother just the same. He's real. He's true."

"I don't understand," the girl put her fist in her mouth and started to cry. "Why are you doing this to me?"

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{!!!!!}

It was dinner and everybody seemed to be famished in Hogwart's Great Hall. No words were said as food was swallowed, as though they had not been feed in years. It was a comfortable silence, and nothing could disturb it.

Except for an owl swooping through the air and down to the headmaster. Owl post came in the morning, not at dinner. The comfort passed into stress as everyone watched the older man remove the seal and draw the letter out. There was a pregnant pause in the air as the headmaster read the letter carefully. His eyes widened a fraction, and a few people gulped. Their headmaster never showed surprise. "Sirius Black?" he whispered. He cleared his throat and repeated, more loudly, "Sirius Black. Come here, please." 

The usually outgoing and loud boy slowly and quietly stood. He looked nervous, and it wasn't his "oh no, I've been caught," nervous look.

"Sirius, what's going on?" Lily whispered as he passed her.

He kept walking until he was standing in front of his headmaster. "Sirius… I have… news that may be taken either well or badly, but I am not sure." The headmaster handed Sirius a letter, which Sirius received cautiously. 

After reading the first sentence, Sirius let out a relieved breath. After the third, he started to grin, and after the last sentence, he started laughing. "Thank god."

"What is it, Sirius?" James asked across the tables.

Sirius turned around to face his friends. "My little sister woke up."

There was silence as everybody watched the cherry Sirius.

Then, "you have a sister?"

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{!!!!!} 

"Usagi, wake up!" a girl yelled over and over in her ear. She opened her eyes and caught her breath. 

"Rei? Ami?" she asked.

"Yes, Usagi, thank god. What happened to you?" Rei asked.

"I… don't know." Usagi lied.

The two girls walked her home, and she climbed into bed immediately.

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{!!!!!}

"How do I know this is real and the other world isn't?" Bailey asked, after waking from the world she was so sure was the truth.

"Think of it, Bailey. In that world, you're a superhero. And not just ANY superhero, a superhero that is loved by all who are good and lusted after by all who are bad. You are the center of that universe. It's not real," the nurse assured her.

"I don't know." Bailey held her head and thought on it.

"Well, Sirius is here. Maybe that will change your mind."

A boy walked into the room, and the two nurses left.

"Bailey? Fucking thank god!" Sirius gasped as he ran to her side. 

Bailey didn't say anything.

"Don't you remember me? They say you don't, but you must! I'm Sirius! You're big brother!"

Bailey didn't remember anything.

"Please, Bailey, remember me?"

Nothing.

She sobbed and tugged her fingers in her hair. She closed her eyes and passed out.

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{!!!!!} 

This world seemed so much more real, but how did she know?

She couldn't.

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{!!!!!} 

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I don't want to be anything other than me

I'm surrounded by liars everywhere I turn

I'm surrounded by imposters everywhere I turn

I'm surrounded by a deadly crisis everywhere I turn

Am I the only one to notice?

I can't be the only one who's learned.


	2. You're the mixed up girl

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Story Title: Pending, but maybe **Peace of Mind** I think that's stupid, though. Suggestions?

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Chapter One: You're the Mixed Up Girl

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Rating: PG13, pending

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Author: Ansley

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Email: enigmaansley@yahoo.com

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Disclaimer: The song _Annie _is by Our Lady Peace. All characters and most places are adopted from either Harry Potter or Sailor Moon. They belong to their respected owners. The story line started from a Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode I watched, but developed differently. 

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Summary: This world seemed so much more real, but how did she know? She couldn't. **Pending, because this sucks.**

Note: I got two reviews. **XD** Okay, that's not a lot. But I'm easily pleased. And I've been a sm x-over reader for a long time. I know how it goes. First chapters hardly ever get reviews. If a story is good, it often doesn't get serious responses until it's quite a few chapters in. And sometimes it doesn't get responses ever, even if it's the best thing in the world. (This is far from that. Haha.) I understand. And I, for one, hardly EVER review. So I don't expect too much. That would be stupid. SO! THANKS TO THOSE WHO DID REVIEW! THIS CHAPTER IS FOR YOU! And I wrote a response to you two at the bottom. Thanks now though!

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Note: I'm a hypocrite. I said I wouldn't update until I was almost done writing with the story, but I guess I'm just a very big hypocrite. But I'm going to try to space out my updates for at least a week, because I don't want to get ahead of myself and not know what to do next. And I'll write as much as I can, as fast as I can. So be patient, and I'll try to keep this alive. And I like suggestions. **XD**

Note: Still need a beta. Please?

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Note: Um... When Usagi is in Sirius's world, she's referred to as Bailey, right? Okay, her name originally was Sara, or something like that, but my friend, who is ACTUALLY named Bailey, changed her name to Bailey Mae. So yesterday, when I said my dear friend Bailey gets stories I wrote sent to her, I was talking about a real Bailey Mae, and not the Bailey in this story. (My friend is so weird.) I'm not changing her name back, because I do like the name Bailey Mae. In fact, I'm fully jealous. I wish that was my name. 

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Note: Bailey in this story is completely, up the wall, insane. And Usagi's world will make her even more insane. You see the beginning of that in this. So, don't expect her to be brilliant and all that average-person stuff. She's weird, and I really want to keep her that way. Because insane is hard for me to write. I keep wanting to make Usagi/Bailey prance around giving out hugs and flowers. So if I slip up and try to make her happy, smack me. I won't blame you. Set me straight if you think I've done the wrong thing. 

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Note: I hate the sailor fighting scenes. They bore me. Sorry it's so cut short. I hate calling Usagi "Moon" and "Sailor Moon" sounds obnoxious when repeated too much. Mars and Saturn and stuff are not as mundane, but I hate saying stuff like "Moon dodged the bullets." And "Sailor Moon dodged the bullets" is... mundane.

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Note: Am I spelling Mirichu's name wrong? Wow.

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FINAL Note: Okay. I hope you enjoy this! Coz I forgot everything else I was going to say! **kthnxbye**

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Peace of Mind {@@@} You're the Mixed Up Girl

"What can we do to save her?" Sirius asked the nurses.

"Where are your parents?"

"They don't care. About Bay. Or me. You have to save her! Forget them, save her!" Sirius screamed.

The first nurse backed away.

The second nurse said, "You need to show her that this world is better than the one in her head. She's attached to that one, and she's afraid of this one. Take her to your school, and introduce her to that world. Make her love it here and hate it there."

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@

"Bailey?" Sirius said, trying to wake her up. When he couldn't, he lifted her into his arms princess style and carried her to the phone that would serve as their portkey to Hogwarts. He grabbed the phone, and opened his eyes seconds later in the Gryffindor common room. Everyone stepped back in surprise, and he grinned. "Hey guys."

The sleeping Bailey gasped in his arms and started wiggling. "Shingo - Shin - Shingo, get back! Don't! Shin-" her eyes snapped open and met Sirius's. "Oh god." She stopped flailing and flung her arms around his neck, sobbing into his shoulder.

"Is she okay?" Lily asked as James and Remus herded everyone out of the room.

Sirius shook his head. "I don't know. Bailey?"

Bailey pulled back and looked him in the face. She wiped her own face and calmed down. "Sirius?"

"Yes."

"I remember you."

"You do?"

"When Momma died, you took me to the beach. You bought me ice cream and made me sand castles. You said I belonged in a world with castles and happiness."

"I did?" he asked weakly.

Bailey nodded. "But I remember you. You're my big brother. You built castles for me and wanted me to be happy."

"Yeah..."

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@

Bailey fell asleep and Sirius sat alone with his friends. "It's my fault."

"What is?" Remus asked.

"She made up a pretend world. She got so into it, she thinks it's real. She thinks she's part of this other world. She's spent the last years in an insane asylum because of it." Sirius explained.

"How is that your fault?" Lily requested.

"Because I told her she should live in a world with castles and happiness. I built her world."

James jumped up. "Screw that! It's not true! You can't help stuff like this!"

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{@@@}

"Are you okay, Shingo?" Usagi asked.

Shingo lay in Usagi's arms, crying. "Mom and Dad are dead!" he screamed, "I'm furious!"

Usagi sighed. "You're mad?"

Shingo sat up. "Doesn't their death make you mad?"

Usagi shook her head; "it makes me sad."

She took Shingo to the beach that day and told him about castles in the sky.

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@

When Usagi went to sleep that night, she clutched Shingo desperately, hoping he'd come with her.

Except, he didn't. She woke up clutching a pillow.

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{@@@}

"Bailey? You up?" Sirius asked.

"Sirius…" she groaned as she sat up.

"Are you hungry?" he asked.

"Yeah..."

"Then let's go to breakfast, okay?" he offered.

"Okay, but do I have to wear this?" she asked, gesturing to her hospital-styled dress.

Sirius laughed and had Lily give her a skirt and blouse. He left the room, and Lily helped the exhausted Bailey get dressed.

"They're a little big, but they work." Lily smiled and led Bailey to Sirius and their friends.

At breakfast, Sirius and James floated food to amuse her, and she laughed hysterically every time something landed in somebody's lap by "mistake." 

James and Sirius took Bailey to their first class, which was divination. At first, they just read fortunes, Sirius and James predicting great pranks they'd play. But the teacher came over, and she asked Bailey if she wanted her fortune read. Bailey said no, but the boys told her she really should, so she agreed.

"I see... that you are a very troubled child. You are torn between two... things, I'm not sure what. I see... lots of depression and dreadful pain-"

Sirius slammed his fist down and yelled, "that's enough!" Bailey had started crying, and backed away from the teacher and next to James. Sirius growled, "I don't appreciate you predicting bad things for my sister."

The teacher smiled. "I am just telling you how it is."

"Well, tell someone else!" Sirius turned to Bailey and asked her if she was okay.

"It's so weird here," she sniffled. She leaned forward and held her head. "I don't know what to do." She started rocking, begging, "stop, stop."

"Bailey?" Sirius asked.

"Usagi!" she heard Shingo yell in her head.

"Bailey?" 

"USA!"

"Bay?"

"USA!"

"Bailey?"

"Usagi! WAKE UP!" Shingo yelled.

She lifted her head back and screamed. 

In Sirius's world, she passed out, and she woke up in Shingo's.

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{@@@}

"Shingo?"

"Usagi! You weren't waking up!"

"Sorry."

"The phone is for you. It's Makato."

"Okay." Usagi took the phone. "Mako?"

"Where are you? We have a meeting!"

"I'll be right there."

"Hurry!"

Usagi left her house for Rei's.

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@

"God, Usa, you're never around anymore!" Rei scolded.

Usagi looked at her feet and whispered meekly, "I'm sorry."

"You should be, you have a duty, you-" Rei was cut off as everyone's communicators went off. "This is Mars," she answered.

"Girls, we need you!" Mirichu, as Sailor Neptune, whispered. "A couple of men are holding a group of people at gun point. We don't know what to do!"

"Where are you?" Rei asked.

"The bank on Arbor Street."

"We'll be there as soon as we can."

"Hurry! Please!"

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@

When they arrived at the bank, they met Uranus, Neptune, and Saturn outside, and then stormed in.

"Drop your weapon!" Sailor Moon ordered.

Everyone looked at her strangely. She didn't give her usual speech.

One of the guys with a gun spun around and shot at them. Immediately, they formed a protective circle around Sailor Moon, just in time for the shooter to give the others the cue to shoot as well. Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter receive the most blows, and fell the ground. Mars and Uranus took a lot of bullets, but they stood strong. Neptune, Saturn, and Sailor Moon hardly got hit.

"I knew you'd come," a voice laughed roughly. Sailor Moon turned around and stared into Shingo's face. A tall lady was holding him captive, and she grabbed the stunned Sailor Moon as well. "You want these two to live," she gestured at Sailor Moon and Shingo, "you come with me. To your death, perhaps. But you come."

Normally, Usagi would have told them not to, but Shingo was in danger. They wouldn't have listened anyway. She kept her mouth shut.

The men with guns herded the senshi through a portal, and then followed. Lastly, the lady shoved Sailor Moon and Shingo into the portal.

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@

It was torture. Usagi was chained to a wall, watching her senshi get whipped and beat.

Usagi turned her head to Shingo. The two were separate from the rest, and neither were being hurt. "How did they know you were related to me?" she asked.

"I don't know. I'm scared, Usagi."

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm scared too. I... can't take this." Usagi closed her eyes and willed herself away.

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{@@@}

Bailey woke up crying in an infirmary bed. "Bailey? What's wrong?" Sirius asked.

Bailey choked. "They've got my friends... they're torturing them... Shingo and I have to watch. All my fault. All my fault. All my fault. Oh my god."

Madam Pomphrey rushed over. "Miss Black, it's not real there. It's not your fault, because it's not real!"

Bailey stopped crying enough to glare at the woman. "Why does everyone keep saying that? It is real! And how would you know?" she snapped. "You've never been there! You've never heard the people scream in pain as youma try to rip their hearts out! You've never heard those nasty, cackling laughs that say they're going to get you! You haven't had people screaming 'you won this time, but next time brings your death!' You haven't had a little girl show up and tell you she's your daughter from the future; that you have to have a baby with a man you like but is older and you don't want to spend your life with! You don't have people manipulating you, forcing you to do things you'd rather not! Your parents didn't JUST die, leaving you with a little brother whom spends his days teasing you! You, your friends, and your brother weren't just kidnapped, and you aren't watching men make cuts in their skin, throwing stones at them, poisoning them, raping them..." Bailey sobbed louder. "If I just made up a world, it would be so simple and clean. I'd grow up happy, and marry a nice man. We'd be so happy. It would be so pleasant. I wouldn't make up something so hurtful. I..." Her eyes unfocused, and she slid down into unconsciousness.

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{@@@}

She screamed. 

Hotaru hung decapitated. Minako had a sword through her stomach and was slowly dying. Mirichu had been poisoned to death, it seemed, Ami as well. Makato, Rei, and Haruka were gone, Usagi presumed dead.

That was it, then. All her senshi were dead, with the exception of Setsuna, whom had disappeared a year ago. But then, Setsuna could be dead as well.

And Mamoru... he was, too. His shirt torn off, death written across his chest with knifes. 

And yesterday, her parents died in a fire.

Shingo was still unharmed. She watched him carefully, noted that all who advanced upon him were swept back, burned by fire.

That was her shield. Rei had constructed it just a week ago. It would kick in when she willed it to.

Unknowingly, Usagi had willed it to protect Shingo, leaving her vulnerable.

But that was okay. Shingo was the most important, now that her senshi were gone.

Her poor senshi...

Now, tiny, pain-filled cuts were being carved into her feet. Her arms were chained above her head, and the bottom of her shirt was cut off. They were carving kanji on her stomach. Words such as death, pain, hate, evil, Satan. 

Her brother was crying in his cage of fire. 

She opened her mouth to tell him it was okay, but something was poured into her mouth. She swallowed on instinct, and her lungs and throat burned. She screamed one last scream before her vocal cords dissolved into nothing.

She didn't understand as she slipped out of that reality.

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{@@@}

When she woke in the other reality, she screamed, just to make sure she could.

But she couldn't.

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{@@@}

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There's something in the way she explains to me,  
'please be careful, I exist in someone else's head.'  
There's something in the way she makes believe  
Please be careful  
Annie dreams that everyone is dead.

{@@@}

end chapter

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Eternal Cosmos - Thank you very much for reviewing! I'm glad you think it was intense coz… I was trying for intense. So thank you!!!! As for whether she is a mix of both worlds... Well, you'll see. **:D** I didn't have her trick everybody to get out of the asylum, because she's kind of confused. She doesn't really understand what's going on and why everything's happening. She completely forgot about Sirius and that world when she... went insane. But I haven't said yet if either worlds were real, so if you think I said one was or one wasn't in the story or in this response, I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I really hope you like what happened, and I'm going to take your suggestions into mind and maybe use something like what you said later on. You'll see, and I hope you like this! **XD **

Lunar Neko-chan - Thank you very much for reviewing! I like support, and I appreciate that you took the time to ask me to continue!! **XD** Thank you so much and I hope you enjoy what I added!


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